Paradise Lost

It's been a while since I last wrote a proper post. By a "proper post", I mean one where I vent about what I've been up to and whether my crappy feelings have overwhelmed me, more than usual that is. So in this post, I'm going to give some updates of what I've been up to recently and talk about them further on and maybe tell you about my plans for the summer (if I've thought about that far). 

Updates: 

1. My attitude towards school continues to disintegrate as the days go by but I getting through it because there are only 6 months left.
2. I've already received 4 offers from universities. 
3. I've started my Stage 4 of Success for Life, which is the final stage in the programme.
4. I got a job!

To be honest with you, it's not surprising that my attitude towards school hasn't changed. I was so excited my final year with a whole new perspective of school but I failed and I partly agree that it's my fault; however if you hear the crap I hear from most of the teachers at my school...you'd probably feel like crap too. I'm not letting it get to me, though. I believe I can definitely do better than what they think I'm capable of. I've never needed their approval and I'm not gonna start now.

Frankly, I like love my school. I mean hell, it's not the best but I'm grateful that it's where I ended up and of course, the teachers are bitter or anything. We are just a tough bunch! We don't mean to be but we just are. They are so enthusiastic and really with us because they want what's best for us. All the teachers that I've crossed paths with at Sydenham have been terrific! Okay, maybe not every one of them but a fair bunch of them and that's what made my experience at this school so remarkable. This doesn't happen with every school but at Sydenham, we are able to communicate with our teachers as if they were 'our' friends. I have learnt that this is what makes a school so successful because whilst you're able to talk to each other including students as adults/acquaintances; you're also able to distinguish that each one demands a certain respect and you give it to them because they've earned it.

With that result, a week ago I applied for university. I mean I wasn't really sure if I wanted to go straight into it after sixth form, and I still don't, but only time can tell. Though before applying, I disturbed multiple teachers trying to get them to read my personal statements (yes, it's plural because I found it to be a traumatising experience writing about myself). But I wasn't discouraged because six personal statements later, I had one that I was proud of; even though it was still unbearable that to get to university, you had to 'sell yourself'. I applied to De Montfort University, Canterbury Christ Church University, Lincoln University, Kent University and Leicester University for a joint degree in English and History, and like, every new thing in my life, I'm dreading it but I'm also thrilled for a whole new world. 

So this is where Arrival comes in. This is what they have been preparing us for, for the past 3 years but going to university, won't mean that we are finished because we are only works in progress. The whole point of Arrival Education is that this is a company, an establishment that believes that young people are capable of achieving huge amounts of success, no matter their background. It's also clearly evident of reality when we look at the successful people in the world today, not all of them came from well off families or inherited their fortunes. Yes, some did but the rest had to work their asses off to get to where they are now. I've currently just started my final stage of Success for Life and well, I'm excited for what lies ahead.

I GOT A JOB! In Leicester Square at Pizza Hut! And I love it! Honestly, it's a lot of work because Leicester Square is a tourist destination, therefore it's always busy but that's why I love it. It's a peek into the adult world. I'm learning so much every time I'm there like how the guys are so hung up on the idea that girls only go out with guys for the money, haha. But they are also giving a whole outlook on the world of work because it's not as I thought it was. My favourite thing... I get to be a WAITRESS! It's always been a dream of mine and now, I'm living it. There's nothing I find more serene than serving others. 

Plans for the summer: 

They've never changed! 

1. TRAVEL - going camping with 2 friends, the first week after I finish exams. Amsterdam, Disneyland and Boston, possibly. Momentum and Soul Survivor, definitely!
2. MUSIC - Leon Bridges on April 8th -> current favourite. Buy a few more vinyl and music festivals, hopefully
3. PHOTOGRAPHY - purchase a polaroid 600 and capture my summer
4. BOOKS - can't have a summer with books
5. FRIENDS & FAMILY - just being with them is enough!